The Art of Listening: Achieving Successful Communication

By: Miriam Zucker, LMSW, ACSW, C-ASWC

As Aging Life Care Managers, we are called upon to provide an assortment of services. The needs are as varied as the families we are helping.  We continuously strive to be experts in our knowledge of homecare, entitlements, senior residences, elder law attorneys, and providing skilled and supportive counseling. But we are only effective if, throughout our dialogue with families, we listen. Effective listening combined with effective communication sets the foundation for successive and successful outcomes.

The art of listening, sometimes referred to as “active listening” requires two essential tasks. First, that we as care managers, listen, making a mindful effort to hear the words that seniors and their family are saying. Second, we must concentrate on what is being said establishing a virtual stop sign that leaves no room for our own assumptions and prejudices. We cannot assume or anticipate conclusions. With these two tasks as starting points, our listening is enhanced by four other components.

We listen mindfully, putting aside any distracting (as opposed to professional beliefs) thoughts. We listen without having an inner dialogue that will have an automatic response to a situation that is verbally evolving.

We listen without interrupting, knowing it may disrupt a client’s train of thought, especially if the person is cognitively compromised. A semi-smile (think Mona Lisa) or an encouraging “uh-huh,” let’s the person know we are with them, we are listening.

We ask for clarification at the appropriate time. Siblings may finish telling of their conflicting feelings about what they each think is best for mom, and we reply: “So let me make sure I understand.” It is that clarification that allows for modification and affirmation.

Finally, after all information has been shared, the Aging Life Care Professional® summarizes what has been said and listens for what has not been said, the latter perhaps a clue to the issue at hand.

Working with an Aging Life Care Manager can provide invaluable support and guidance for families navigating the complexities of aging. Professionals offer comprehensive assessments, care planning, and coordination of services, ensuring that seniors receive the appropriate care and support they need. By partnering with an Aging Life Care Manager, families can feel confident that their loved ones are receiving the best possible care, while also gaining peace of mind and reducing stress. Additionally, Aging Life Care Managers can act as mediators and impartial advisors on sensitive family issues, helping to facilitate open communication and resolve conflicts.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Miriam Zucker, LMSW, ACSW, C-ASWCM is the founder of Directions in Aging, an Aging Life Care practice based in Westchester County, New York. She did her post master’s training at the Brookdale Center for Healthy Aging where she later served as a faculty member. Founded in 1988, Directions in Aging brings over two decades of experience working with older adults and their families.

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