Monthly Archives: August 2015

https://youtu.be/oRmYGksFuBc

Service to Clients Goes Beyond Care Management

Trust. Honor. Respect. These are words you hear over and over when listening to Aging Life Care Professionals™ talk about their clients.  Many, if not all, will tell you that what keeps a care manager going is the relationships with their clients and their client’s trust in them.

In this story, Karen Wasserman, MSW, LICSW, CASWCM of Newton, MA shares that the relationship between an Aging Life Care™ Manager and a client often becomes more than just home or medical care management. This touching story of how she helped her client – a Holocaust survivor – give a treasured violin to the Holocaust Museum is a beautiful example of trust, honor, and respect.

 

HOW DO I FIND AN AGING LIFE CARE PROFESSIONAL™?

Looking for an Aging Life Care Professional? We have made it easy to locate a professional near you with our Find an Aging Life Care Expert Search feature.


This blog is for informational purposes only and does not constitute, nor is it intended to be a substitute for, professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Information on this blog does not necessarily reflect official positions of the Aging Life Care Association™ and is provided “as is” without warranty. Always consult with a qualified professional with any particular questions you may have regarding your or a family member’s needs.

My parent is dying

What is the Difference Between Palliative Care and Hospice Care?

by Melissa L. Johnson, RN, BSN, MHA, CHPN, CCM – Aging Life Care Association™ Member

 

Palliative care and hospice care are both specialized healthcare models that focus on palliation or relief of symptoms associated with serious, debilitating illnesses. Such symptoms may include pain, difficulty breathing, nausea or the need for additional emotional support. Palliative care and hospice care focus on improving one’s quality of life. Palliative care is a component of hospice care while hospice care may not be a component of palliative care. In other words, hospice care comprises of palliative care to treat symptoms while palliative care stands alone as a care model. Hospice and Palliative care were once thought of as a service for just the elderly and while the majority of hospice patients are older, about 20% are under the age of 65 (American Hospice Foundation).

Palliative Care

Palliative care, while focusing on symptom management, also allows for aggressive treatment. For example, an individual with cancer may choose palliative care for relief of pain and nausea, as well as undergo chemotherapy and radiation. With palliative care, an individual has access to needed resources throughout the process and can make informed decisions about their care. The synergetic relationship between symptom management and aggressive treatment often yields better results than aggressive treatment alone. If aggressive treatment is no longer feasible or desired, the transition to hospice care may be practical.

Hospice Care

Hospice is a model of care that focuses on the end of life where aggressive treatments are no longer indicated or desired. Hospice care focuses on palliation of symptoms to allow terminally ill individuals to live the rest of their lives to the fullest extent possible. Hospice goes beyond a medical model where all aspects of the end of life experience are considered: physical, emotional, psychosocial and spiritual. A team of specially trained professionals collaborate with the patient and the family to address end of life issues and goals for care.

Does Hospice Speed Up The Dying Process?

While it is believed by some that hospice is “giving up,” research indicates that individuals receiving hospice care may live longer than those who do not receive hospice care. A study published by the Journal of Pain and Symptom Management (March 2007) found that Medicare beneficiaries with either congestive heart failure or certain types of cancer lived, on average, 29 days longer than those who did not receive hospice services (NHPCO, 2010). Another common misconception about hospice care is terminally ill individuals are given medications, such as morphine, that contribute to a hastened death. While medications like morphine are initiated, the dosage prescribed is at the lowest quantity needed to provide comfort. “Start low and go slow” is the motto hospices operate by when prescribing medications.

The Death Experience

Death can be a beautiful and peaceful experience. I have many special memories of my time as a hospice nurse, but there is one that stands out. I was called out to a patient’s house on Christmas night. It was pitch dark and I was in the middle of nowhere. I knew I was approaching the home because there were many people standing outside. I walked into this small home with about 50 people inside; barely able to get in the house to the patient. I saw an elderly gentleman who was nearing the end. I talked to his wife about what had occurred that led to the call. As she explained the decline, I could hear family members arguing in the background. Some family members thought the patient needed to go to the hospital while others stated there is nothing more that can be done and it is his wish to be comfortable.

I did my assessment and told the family that the patient was probably minutes from death. I am not sure what came over the family, but they all surrounded the patient’s bed and started to sing, “For He’s a Jolly Good Fellow.”  The patient’s breathing became shallow and slow. As they sang the last line, “which nobody can deny,” the patient took a long, deep breath, let it out and left this earth.

Immediately after, various wind chimes could be heard. The wife stated, “He always loved wind chimes.” A death that I imaged to be difficult was one of the most beautiful deaths I can recall. The family will forever have that memory of their loved one’s death; one that was peaceful, calm and brought the family together.

Aging Life Care Association™

When facing a serious illness, Aging Life Care™ Experts prove to be beneficial as they are able to be a part of your journey throughout the process.  An Aging Life Care Expert provides assessment and monitoring, advocacy, education, resources, problem-solving, and support while you make difficult decisions.  An Aging Life Care Expert is also a resource to the family, while providing support and communication. To find an Aging Life Care Expert in your area,visit aginglifecare.org.

About the author: Melissa Johnson has been an Aging Life Care Expert in Phoenix, Arizona since 2012. Melissa specializes in Dementia care and Hospice and Palliative Care. She invites you to connect with her by visiting her blog  or following Melissa on LinkedIn and Facebook.


 

This blog is for informational purposes only and does not constitute, nor is it intended to be a substitute for, professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Information on this blog does not necessarily reflect official positions of the Aging Life Care Association™and is provided “as is” without warranty. Always consult with a qualified professional with any particular questions you may have regarding your or a family member’s needs.


 

Aging Life Care Association® Members on Trust and Honor

Aging Life Care Professional® Karen Wasserman, MSW, LICSW, CASWCM of Newton, MA shares that the relationship between an Aging Life Care® Manager and a client is way often more than just home or medical care management. In this story, Ms. Wasserman tells how she helped Gertrude – a Holocaust survivor – find peace in life by making a special gift to the Holocaust Museum.

Nursing Home Care

How to Ease Your Loved One’s Move to a Nursing Home

Tips for Managing this Big Transition Without Guilt

 

By Deborah Liss Fins, MSSW, LICSW, CMC, Aging Life Care Association™ Member and Fellow of the Leadership Academy

 

The decision to move your aging parent into a nursing home can be one of the most difficult you’ll ever face. Plenty of guilt. Will he feel comfortable? Will she get the proper care? Won’t it feel impersonal? It’s so expensive! And the biggest guilt trip—why couldn’t you just keep your loved one at home and take care of him or her, yourself?

But the reality is that home-based care isn’t always the best alternative, even if you have the best intentions. Some people need more care than you can provide safely at home. A parent who has frequent medical emergencies that require trips to the ER may actually be better cared for in a nursing home, which has a medical support team on staff. A parent with advancing dementia needs a secure setting and caregivers with special training.

Your health and well-being count, too. If you’re worn out from caring for your parent and holding down a job in addition, you can find yourself sick, angry, or just making more mistakes due to exhaustion. And if you’re staying at home to care for your parent, forfeiting employment, your personal financial situation may be at risk. The situation becomes all the more complicated if you have children at home who also need your attention. There’s only so much of you to go around, and your needs count, too. (Take this Caregiver Burnout Quiz to see if you are at risk)

Be Honest: Where Will Your Loved One Be Safest?

There are many tradeoffs to consider. Your parent’s safety is a key determining factor. Setting your own ego aside and screening out what you think are society’s expectations, take time to assess your parent’s needs and how he or she will be cared for best. Be honest with yourself about what you can and cannot do. Seek input from trusted family members and friends, as well as professional insights from an Aging Life Care Professional™. Include your parent in the decision, to the extent that he or she is able to participate.

Once you’ve agreed that a move to a nursing home is best, you’ll need to research alternatives. Be sure to visit. When picking a site, notice whether the staff and leadership know residents by name. Can you envision your parent fitting in with the other residents? Is staff interested in learning about your loved one’s personal preferences? Here are some more points to consider.

Be Empathetic: What Will Help Your Loved One Feel Most at Home?

When you’ve made your arrangements and are ready to help your loved one move, here are some other tips to ease the transition.

Look at the move from your loved one’s perspective. What can you bring to his or her new room to make it feel familiar and comfortable? You may be able to include a favorite chair, family pictures, a comforter or other personal items. Consider bringing your loved one’s favorite music, too–on an iPod, CDs and CD player, or even a satellite radio set-up.

If your parent will have a roommate, talk to the nursing home staff in advance to explore issues that could create a conflict, such as:

  •     Waking and sleeping habits
  •     Need for privacy
  •     Desire for companionship
  •     Grooming habits
  •     Need for orderly space
  •     Sensitivity to noise or inability to hear well

Ask what kinds of clothing will be appropriate. Determine whether you will have the facility do your parent’s laundry or if you will take care of it, which will affect whether or not your parent will take more delicate items that cannot withstand industrial laundering.

Be Realistic: Adjusting to a New Setting Takes Time

Be supportive, and be realistic. Don’t expect your parent to be thrilled with his or her new surroundings at the beginning. This is a huge adjustment and will take time. Do your best to listen, and tap the professionals, including nursing staff and social workers, to help both you and your parent make the transition. Visit often. Be present. Observe how your parent is being cared for and speak up if there are issues.

At the same time, try not to let your parent’s frustrations or complaints — which are inevitable — to throw you off. Remember…the ultimate measure of the move is your parent’s health and well-being over time—and your own.

Be Prepared: Seek Professional Guidance

If you need help or guidance in making a decision about nursing or assisted living care for your loved one, talk to an Aging Life Care Professional™. Aging Life Care Professionals can help you determine if a move is best for your loved one; and if so, help you find the facility that is the best-fit to meet the individual’s needs. Find an Aging Life Care™ Expert at aginglifecare.org.

About the author: Deborah Liss Fins has over 35 years of experience in aging life care issues. She is the President of Deborah Fins Associates, PC in Worcester, MA.  Debbie is a member of the Board of Directors of the Aging Life Care Association™  and co-chair of the Education Committee.  Follow her on LinkedIn and Twitter @DeborahFinsALCM or email her at DLFins@finseldercare.com.  Deborah Fins Associates has a presence on Facebook – we invite you to like our page.


This blog is for informational purposes only and does not constitute, nor is it intended to be a substitute for, professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Information on this blog does not necessarily reflect official positions of the Aging Life Care Association™ and is provided “as is” without warranty. Always consult with a qualified professional with any particular questions you may have regarding your or a family member’s needs.

Free eBook on Bringing Balance to Your Life as a Caregiver

Caring for Aging Parents? Here are Six Steps to Help You Find Balance

Aging Life Care Association™ Releases Free eBook to Help You Live Well While Caring for Aging Parents

by Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC, Aging Life Care Association™ Member and Fellow of the Leadership Academy

 

We all strive for balance in our lives – nimbly tossing all those balls in the air and navigating their trajectory. When one of those balls is caring for our aging parents, our sense of personal balance is challenged. If we have children ourselves, we enter the sandwich generation zone where we are soon overtaxed and stressed out.

A reminder may be in order that equilibrium is the key to living well as we divide our time among the needs of our parents, children, partners, jobs and ourselves. The pull to care, or over care, often knocks that balance off its feet.

For example, is it easy to skip your gym or yoga class because Mom needs a prescription picked up, or Dad wants you with him when he sees his cardiologist? Do you rush from work, to your daughter’s soccer game, to checking in on a sick parent? Has it become a way of life to spend a day cooking for your aging parents while consuming unhealthy fast food yourself, no time for your own home-cooked meal?

Free eBook on Bringing Balance to Your Life as a Caregiver
Six Steps to Living Well While Caring for Aging Parents – a free eBook from the Aging Life Care Association™

The good news is, you can tackle these challenges and create a more balanced life. Friends and family are often a great resource. In addition, gathering a team of professionals in the aging network to be your navigation guides can bring clarity and relief. Don’t be fearful of bringing in skilled experts because of the cost – consider the fees you pay as an investment in everyone’s well-being. The professional guidance will set you on a successful path so you won’t be derailed by caregiver stress, and can actually save you money in the long run.

In this eBook, we provide you with information you need in order to prepare for and effectively manage potential crises and demands. We’ll show you how to defuse your crises and steer things back into control. As adult children caring for our parents, we may not be able to reverse the inevitable end-of-life issues our parents are facing, but we can prepare ourselves with information ahead of time so there are fewer surprises.

Don’t wait, download this free eBook – Six Steps to Living Well While Caring for Aging Parents – and put balance back in your life.

About the author: Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC, is the Founder and President of Eldercare Services in Walnut Creek, CA. She is also a partner of the VillagePlan. Linda is a Fellow of the Leadership Academy and past-president of the Aging Life Care Association. Linda has over 30 years experience working as a Care Manager. You can reach her at linda@EldercareAnswers.com, or connect with her via social media: Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.


This blog is for informational purposes only and does not constitute, nor is it intended to be a substitute for, professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Information on this blog does not necessarily reflect official positions of the Aging Life Care Association™ and is provided “as is” without warranty. Always consult with a qualified professional with any particular questions you may have regarding your or a family member’s needs.

Parents Aging at Home

Help! I’m Questioning My Father’s Decision-Making

For Families With a Loved One Who Can No Longer Make Important Decisions

by Phyllis Mensh Brostoff, CISW, CMC, Aging Life Care Association™ Member and Fellow of the Leadership Academy

 

There might come a time when someone you love becomes unable to continue making their own decisions. At that point, they need someone to step in and act in their best interests. You may have noticed changes in a parent’s behavior, appearance, physical health, daily routine, or eating habits. A simple way to assess their current decision-making capacity is to answer these questions:

  • Has your father (for example) lost any substantial amount of weight in the past six – eight months without dieting?
  • Does he keep appointments you have made with him?
  • Is the housekeeping the way it has always been?
  • Does he call you or someone else frequently, asking the same questions but forgetting that he had just spoken to you?
  • Has his personal grooming deteriorated?

Ability to decide: If you observe significant changes in your family member’s personal care, memory, and thinking, ask yourself these additional questions:

  • If my father faced an important decision that he had to make, could he comprehend and consider the facts necessary to make the decision?
  • Can he deliberate about the facts in a manner that is consistent with his own past ways of thinking about things?
  • Can he communicate his decisions to me?

If he does not seem to be able to comprehend the facts about decisions he needs to make, or seems to be making decisions that are inconsistent with similar decisions he has made in the past, you should arrange for an assessment by an Aging Life Care Professional™, a physician, or a psychologist. In most states, health care decision-making passes to the person who has been identified as the Health Care Power of Attorney when: Two physicians or a physician and a psychologist have examined the individual, and state in writing that the person is unable to receive and evaluate information effectively or to communicate decisions to the extent that the person lacks the capacity to manage their own health care decision-making.

Having your father choose a Health Care Power of Attorney early  is an important step. When a Health Care Power of Attorney is determined early, before a crisis,  your father has the opportunity to discuss his preferences and health care choices and decisions. The Aging Life Care Professional can help facilitate this conversation making sure important questions are answered, such as desires to be pain-free, accepting or avoiding life-prolonging interventions under various circumstances, and even answer if your father would like to be buried or cremated.  Having these discussions before they are needed will help ensure that your father’s wishes are followed and opinions known, saving you from the added stress of assuming you know what your father would want.

The Rogers’ Family’s Story

Sarah Roger’s adult children – Josh and Karen – were distraught at the meeting with an Aging Life Care™ Manager. They needed to decide how to proceed with their mother, who was in the hospital due to dehydration and a urinary tract infection. The discharge planner had told Josh and Karen that their mother was ready to leave the hospital. But Sarah lived alone and her children could not agree on whether she should return to her home or move to a facility. Karen, who spoke to her mother daily, thought Sarah was “getting senile,” since her mother recently had begun to repeat herself and couldn’t remember appointments they had arranged. Josh thought his mother was fine and could get along with just a little more help, which he was willing to provide. Neither of her children had asked Sarah what she wanted to do. The Care Manager arranged for an assessment of Sarah Rogers’s cognitive functioning before she left the hospital.

After examining Sarah, the psychiatrist and the Care Manager met with the whole family. The psychiatrist explained that the memory and thinking problems that Karen had observed might have been caused by her mom’s acute illnesses.  While she had some loss of mental functioning, Sarah was still capable of making her own decisions. The Care Manager explained the purpose of a Power of Attorney for Health Care and Sarah signed the form, designating her daughter as her primary agent and her son as her secondary agent.

The family agreed that it would be helpful to have an agency provide Sarah with some home care so that her children did not feel overwhelmed. Since she lived in an apartment near a shopping center, and had no steps to climb, she could return home safely, with a shower chair and bars installed in the tub and near the toilet to increase her safety. Josh agreed to help her balance her checkbook, and her daughter agreed to do the food shopping. The Rogers family left the conference feeling that they had a workable home-care plan with which everyone was comfortable.

The Aging Life Care Association™ offers an online directory of Aging Life Care Professionals at aginglifecare.org. Find an expert near you or your loved one today.

About the author: Phyllis Mensh Brostoff, CISW, CMC, is a social worker and co-founded Stowell Associates 31 years ago in Milwaukee, Wisconsin providing Aging Life Care management and home care services. She has written numerous articles and presented seminars across the country. Follow her on Twitter at @CareManagerMilw, Facebook at Stowell Associates Inc, or email her at phyllisb@caremanagedhomecare.com.


This blog is for informational purposes only and does not constitute, nor is it intended to be a substitute for, professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Information on this blog does not necessarily reflect official positions of the Aging Life Care Association™ and is provided “as is” without warranty. Always consult with a qualified professional with any particular questions you may have regarding your or a family member’s needs.

What is an Aging Life Care Professional?

Elder Law Attorneys and Aging Life Care Professionals: A Beneficial Relationship

Take a Closer Look at the Trusted Advisor Relationship Between Elder Law Attorneys and Aging Life Care Professionals™

by Bunni Dybnis, MA, MFT, CMC – Aging Life Care Association Member and Fellow of the Leadership Academy

 

There are many reasons why the partnering of Elder Law attorneys and Aging Life Care Professionals™ is beneficial to both professionals and  clients. In my personal experience, an increasing number of Elder Law Attorneys have called upon our skills, hiring us as part of their team. Our two professional groups often focus on similar objectives with complementary but different roles.

  • Both professions specialize in helping adults and their families who are aging or have special needs.
  • Elder Law attorneys use a variety of legal tools and techniques to meet the goals and objectives of their clients. Aging Life Care Professionals have diverse educational backgrounds, experience and specific knowledge of older adults. With degrees in nursing, social work, mental health or other related fields, Aging Life Care Professionals have the clinical ability and tools to assist clients and Elder Law attorneys.
  • Both professions typically work with a wide range of professionals in various fields to provide their clients quality service and to ensure their complex needs are met.
  • Both professions assist clients in planning for current and long-term care needs, including home care and nursing home care, assessing the appropriate level of care, coordinating private and public resources to finance the costs of care, and upholding the client’s right to quality care in the least restrictive setting.
Working Together for the Client

The Aging Life Care Professional regularly calls upon the Elder Law attorney for planning long-term Medicaid eligibility for clients in skilled nursing facilities or alternative waiver programs and in the preparation of wills, estate plans, advanced directives, conservatorships, and Special Needs Trusts. Aging Life Care Professionals also look to Elder Law attorneys to address possible nursing home abuse, elder abuse, and undue influence, including financial abuse.

The Aging Life Care Professional’s plan of care for most clients includes participation by an Elder Law attorney in achieving the goals identified by the Aging Life Care Professional in an assessment of the client’s physical, mental, family, social, safety, legal, and financial status and future planning needs.

The Aging Life Care Professional can be of great value as a trusted advisor to legal colleagues in achieving their client’s legal goals and goals outside the scope of the law. This advisory role may include:

  • Completing objective assessments and plans of care for legal proceedings.
  • Gathering previously undisclosed information for the ELA by onsite observation of the client’s current care situation, functional abilities, environmental dangers and relationships.
  • Providing oversight for the courts and families to monitor adherence to an agreed-upon plan.
  • Recommending personalized referrals regarding placement options, home care needs, and community resources for medical, psychiatric, social and other needs.
  • Providing counseling, conflict resolution, and care coordination to enhance the quality of life for all involved.
  • Overseeing medical insurance and long-term care insurance plans, as well as Special Needs Trusts to ensure compliance with the plans and optimal benefits are received.
  • Advocating to ensure optimal medical and mental health treatment and access to community and entitlement programs.
  • Assisting with applications for government entitlement programs and ensuring ongoing benefits are maximized.
  • Providing expert witness in cases involving standards of care and other related areas of knowledge and experience.

In addition to specific needs that are defined by legal needs, there are often clues that a client may benefit from interventions from an Aging Life Care Professional. They may include: the smell of urine, change in client’s appearance, decline in client’s physical or cognitive abilities, growing family conflict, lack of medical attention, an overinvolved caretaker, sense of secrecy or information not being disclosed, or a sudden change in the client’s life including requests to change a will, death or illness of a spouse or child.

Trusted Advisor

As I examine the meaning of the term trusted advisor, I reference my relationship with several Elder Law attorneys with whom I am privileged to work, and notice some common threads:

  • It is essential we both look at long-term relationships, and not short-term results. This applies to the referrals I give for clients in need of legal services and those served by my profession.
  • We both put the client’s interest ahead of our own and any others. This is a field loaded with ethical dilemmas which need to be addressed.
  • Aging Life Care Professionals and Elder Law attorneys both demonstrate interest in not only the client, but in their extended contacts, both personal and professional.
  • We both endeavor to understand and address our client’s needs beyond what is stated. Issues of capacity and undue influence complicate many situations.
  • Self-determination, confidentiality, cooperation, and loyalty are ethical tenets shared by both in our relationships with our clients.
  • We must both consistently and reliably follow-up. Our clients are often vulnerable and isolated. We may have to go beyond our explicit roles to ensure there is success in the outcomes.

As the number of older adults grow, the options are expanding and the challenges becoming more complex. It is a privilege to collaborate with my legal colleagues for the benefit of our clients. To connect with an Aging Life Care Professional, visit aginglifecare.org for a directory of Aging Life Care™ Experts.

About the author: Bunni Dybnis, MA, MFT, CMC  is Director of Professional Services for LivHOME in Los Angeles, CA.


This blog is for informational purposes only and does not constitute, nor is it intended to be a substitute for, professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Information on this blog does not necessarily reflect official positions of the Aging Life Care Association™and is provided “as is” without warranty. Always consult with a qualified professional with any particular questions you may have regarding your or a family member’s needs.

choosing the right in-home care agency for your loved one

Searching for a Health and Social Services Career? Take a Look at Aging Life Care™.

Do you have a passion for helping aging adults and their families? Are you looking for a rewarding health and social services career? Then take a closer look at the blossoming field of Aging Life Care™ today.

by Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC, Aging Life Care Association™ Member and Fellow of the Leadership Academy

 

Aging Life Care Professionals™, also known as Geriatric Care Managers are in demand with the Baby Boomers stepping into their retirement years at a fast pace. The increasing number of families struggling with aging-related challenges becomes an opportunity to move your career toward a private or group practice in order to meet the needs of many in need of an advocate with expertise.

This could be a career journey junction for you if your current position does not provide you with job satisfaction, or if your values and that of your employer are at a crossroad. For many of us, becoming an Aging Life Care Professional was a second career after working for years in the medical, government, or non-profit worlds. We wanted a longer term relationship with clients, and we wanted to make a difference in people’s lives.

It is a profession where you can set your own hours and limit the time and energy you want to expend on your career – many solo practitioners support and collaborate with one another to facilitate time away and a balanced life.

You do need experience with older adults and educational training that supports your expertise in this field. The Aging Life Care Association™, formerly known as the National Association of Professional Geriatric Care Managers, has supported professionals in this field for 30 years. All members adhere to a  Code of Ethics and Standards of Practice, and are provided continuing education, support, and “know how” from colleagues around the country.

As a professional in the field since 1984, I can say this career has been a highlight of my life, and never a “job.” My personal path took me from a solo practice in 1989 to a large practice of over 20 care managers and we have added other services to our menu, as many of my colleagues across the country have done as well.

Aging Life Care Professionals are skilled in doing comprehensive assessments, writing up care plans for families, referring to solid, well-known resources, being aware of and referring clients to entitlements, as well as long-term advocacy and monitoring of older adults or younger disabled adults in any setting – from home to skilled nursing. You may have a specific interest, passion, or area of expertise that will become the focus of your practice – that special gift you bring can be what will set you apart.

You can blossom as an expert with the support you need from an organization that listens, supports, and provides learning opportunities in many formats. Join us if you want a career that matters.

To learn more about a career in Aging Life Care and about the Aging Life Care Association, you are invited to attend a free webinar – Aging Life Care: Why You? Why Now? – on Thursday, September 3, 2015.

About the author: Linda Fodrini-Johnson, MA, MFT, CMC, is the Founder and President of Eldercare Services in Walnut Creek, CA. She is also a partner of the VillagePlan. Linda is a Fellow of the Leadership Academy and past-president of the Aging Life Care Association. Linda has over 30 years experience working as a Care Manager. You can reach her at linda@EldercareAnswers.com, or connect with her via social media: Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.


This blog is for informational purposes only and does not constitute, nor is it intended to be a substitute for, professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Information on this blog does not necessarily reflect official positions of the Aging Life Care Association™ and is provided “as is” without warranty. Always consult with a qualified professional with any particular questions you may have regarding your or a family member’s needs.

Learn how Aging Life Care Managers are combatting loneliness and social isolation

Seven Signs That an Aging Parent Needs Help

As an Aging Life Care™ advisor, I know how fiercely older adults  cling to their independence. Many feel that their adult children don’t understand them or are making something out of nothing — a fall, a burnt pot, a call from the police station. They make promises to ask for help shopping, assure a son they will only drive on familiar streets, and promise to hang up when an unsolicited call for money comes in. The need to be safe and the rejection of that safety in the name of independence and dignity is a real struggle.  So how do you know when safety should trump the desire to appear and remain independent?

Here are seven signs that your aging parent may need help:

1. You come for a visit, open the refrigerator to get a glass of juice and the expiration date was three months ago. The refrigerator may have a strong odor, and the kitchen may be full of rotten food.

2. Mail is piling up. Bills may be going unpaid, and utilities at risk of being shut off.

3. You’re not sure that medications are being taken correctly, due to changes in your parent’s vision, dexterity, or memory. Pills are still in their bottles, or medication boxes seem untouched between visits. You may find medications dropped or spilled on the floor.

4. You’re concerned about personal hygiene. You parent may be wearing soiled clothing, bathing infrequently, and not attending to personal care tasks such as oral hygiene.

5. “Mother is absolutely fine,” you hear your father say. And mother automatically agrees. After fifty plus years of marriage, they have learned how to compensate for one another, and they’re arm in arm on the road to trouble.

6. You’re receiving concerned phone calls or emails from friends or neighbors, who may be stepping in to provide help when they can, but are frustrated.

7. The car has noticeable new scratches and dents, maintenance is being ignored, and you’re concerned about your parent’s ability to drive safely.

If you notice just one of these happening with your parent, it is time to have a conversation. If you need help starting that conversation or implementing a plan of care, consider working with an Aging Life Care Professional. Aging Life Care Professionals™ understand the frustration felt by adult children and the desperation felt by older adults who want to hold on to their independence. With an objective perspective on the situation, we can help facilitate difficult family discussions and decision-making to address these and other concerns.

To locate an Aging Life Care Expert near you, search this directory of members.

About the author: Miriam Zucker, LMSW, C-ASWCM is an Aging Life Care™ Specialist. She is founder of Directions in Aging, based in Westchester County, New York.


This blog is for informational purposes only and does not constitute, nor is it intended to be a substitute for, professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Information on this blog does not necessarily reflect official positions of the Aging Life Care Association™and is provided “as is” without warranty. Always consult with a qualified professional with any particular questions you may have regarding your or a family member’s needs.

caregivers in need of a vacation

Tips for Caregivers in Need of a Summer Vacation

When you are responsible for the care of an aging loved one, a summer vacation or weekend getaway may seem impossible or out-of-reach. The questions race through your mind: What happens if mom falls? Who will remind Dad to take his medications? What if there is a storm? You feel overwhelmed and cancel your plans.

With a Plan in Place You Can Take a Vacation from Caregiving Duties

Not taking time away from caregiving responsibilities can lead to bigger problems – caregiver burnout, stress, or poor health. With some extra planning and help, you can take a break. Aging Life Care™ experts offer these tips to help make sure your loved one is safe and comfortable while you are away:

1. In-Home Caregivers: If there is not another family member or trusted friend or neighbor to fill in for you, connect with an Aging Life Care Professional who can help arrange for in-home care, monitoring, or transportation needs. Many Aging Life Care Professionals offer 24/7 service and can serve as an emergency contact while you are away. Depending on the individual’s needs, paid caregivers can assist with activities of daily living – bathing, dressing, mobility, meal preparations, house cleaning, or transportation. If you plan on using a caregiver, spend time getting the caregiver and your loved one familiar and comfortable with each other and to be sure that the caregiver is a good match.

2. Organize Important Documents: Prepare a folder or binder of information for the person/agency who will provide care and oversight while you are away. Include information on emergency contacts, physicians, preferred hospital, pharmacy, and other service providers, such as therapy services, Meals on Wheels, home care agency, etc. Also include your loved one’s medication list and other important documents such as Power of Attorney, Living Will, Advance Directives, and Do Not Resuscitate orders.

3. In-Home Technology: There are a variety of new technologies designed for keeping aging adults safe in their homes, including personal emergency response systems (PERS), GPS tracking devices, automated medication reminders and dispensers, as well as systems that allow you to remotely monitor or control the usage of certain electrical outlets or appliances.

4. Respite Care: Many retirement communities, assisted living facilities, and nursing homes offer respite care on a per diem basis for short stays. If your loved one just needs daytime-only activities or supervision, consider an adult day care center.

“Caregiving is exhausting and difficult work,” says Jeffrey S. Pine, Aging Life Care Association president, “but with some extra planning and research, it is possible to take some time away from your caregiving responsibilities to recharge your batteries.”

To access a nationwide directory of Aging Life Care Professionals, please visit aginglifecare.org.


This blog is for informational purposes only and does not constitute, nor is it intended to be a substitute for, professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Information on this blog does not necessarily reflect official positions of the Aging Life Care Association™ and is provided “as is” without warranty. Always consult with a qualified professional with any particular questions you may have regarding your or a family member’s needs.